Happy Halloween, folks! In the spirit of this wacky and sometimes gothic holiday, I’ve decided to include sites involving heaven, hell, near death experiences and, of course, pumpkins. It’s all very loosely tied together as always, but at least I’m making moves towards cohesion for you readers that care about that.

It’s truly a catch-22 writing StatonFacts. I’m told I need to be more random and then I’m told I need my sites and subjects to be tied to a theme. How can I orchestrate random organization? E-mail me more of your oxymorons. Let me know.

In the meantime, here’s a site with carved pumpkins. The site belongs to Michigan artist Ray Villafane. He specializes in sculptures, works for McFarlane Toys and even manages to construct some of the most amazing carved pumpkins ever seen.

Villafane gives a step-by-step tutorial on detailed three-dimensional pumpkin carving and provides a striking gallery of his work. There are a couple of Frankensteins, a David Letterman and my personal favorite, the Predator.

Villafane warns that this caliber of carving requires a certain kind of pumpkin and the pumpkin can easily be ruined even after hours of detailed work. Then, the pumpkin spoils after approximately a week, giving them an extraordinarily small life span. Don’t forget the camera, and get ready for some frustration. I’ll let you know how my pumpkin turns out.

http://www.villafanestudios.com/pumpkins.htm

I’ve recently found an article on msnbc.com about CPR specialists training new technicians to perform CPR to the beat of the Bee Gee’s “Stayin’ Alive.” According to the article, the song has 103 beats per minute, the “perfect number to maintain … the best rhythm for performing” CPR.

That’s right, if you receive CPR at any time in the future, a disco hit may be the one thing that keeps you from dying. But did these specialists ever consider that maybe people stay alive when they hear this song because it’s the last song anyone would ever want to die to? Give me “Immortality” by Pearl Jam or “Last Goodbye” by Jeff Buckley, but never give me disco.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/27221281/?

As for the heaven and hell portion of the column, we have a Nebraska senator by the name of Ernie Chambers that recently filed a lawsuit against God. Chambers charged that God had wrought “widespread death, destruction, and terrorization of millions” of Earth’s inhabitants. The judge in the case threw out the suit because God had not been properly served because he had no permanent mailing address (no kidding).

I’m appalled by this story, and not because of religious reasons or fear that God may end up in the slammer. I’m appalled by this because a state senator, a purported leader of this country, is wasting his time with a ridiculous lawsuit like this. During all this court time, he could have personally fed a homeless person, built a house for a family in need or written an article about pumpkin carving and really made a difference.

http://opinion.latimes.com/opinionla/2008/10/god-christianit.html